Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Communication and Lack Thereof
In the past few days I have overheard people discussing their problems. 98% of their problems come from poor communication, or miscommunication.
I still recommend a book that was originally written for parenting, but is one of the finest and easiest to use communication resources I have ever found. It is How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk.
Happy talking and listening!
In the past few days I have overheard people discussing their problems. 98% of their problems come from poor communication, or miscommunication.
I still recommend a book that was originally written for parenting, but is one of the finest and easiest to use communication resources I have ever found. It is How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk.
Happy talking and listening!
Labels: Communication, listening, poor, talking
Friday, August 17, 2007
People must first buy YOU and then buy your ideas. Most of us don't value what a person says if we don't first value the person.
Tell people who are, and why you are qualified to speak on your topic.
I am studying Storytelling and will give you ideas about how to better tell your story.
In the meantime, make eye contact, speak loud enough and slowly and help others catch your ideas.
Best to you,
Reesa
866/ 0K SPEAK 866/ 657-7325
www.ConfidentSpeaking.com
info@ConfidentSpeaking.com
Tell people who are, and why you are qualified to speak on your topic.
I am studying Storytelling and will give you ideas about how to better tell your story.
In the meantime, make eye contact, speak loud enough and slowly and help others catch your ideas.
Best to you,
Reesa
866/ 0K SPEAK 866/ 657-7325
www.ConfidentSpeaking.com
info@ConfidentSpeaking.com
Labels: Establish your Credibility
Monday, August 06, 2007
Setting the Tone
I volunteered for my friend Miriam who was the coordinator for the last Harry Potter book party at a major book seller chain.
When the cashiers finally were allowed to open up, there was a collective, “Whooop!!” among the hundreds of people in line. Many had come to the store in the afternoon to get their number of place in line.
A fellow screamed frantically into the microphone stating which numbers were next to be admitted into the store. He was a tired, burnt out employee. “NUMBERS 150 to 200!#!@!*!” He did that with the next several groups until I found Miriam.
I suggested that she let him know that he sets the tone by using that frantic, out of control, crazed tone. The people in line were already excited and tired – was he adding to the fun of the evening or setting things off in a negative direction? Although he felt the same, the next messages were delivered with strength and warmth.
ANY time you speak, you are an actor delivering your message in the best way possible for others to receive it; it doesn’t matter what is going on with you. If it is appropriate to tell what is going on with you - just deliver your message in a way that can be most easily received.
I volunteered for my friend Miriam who was the coordinator for the last Harry Potter book party at a major book seller chain.
When the cashiers finally were allowed to open up, there was a collective, “Whooop!!” among the hundreds of people in line. Many had come to the store in the afternoon to get their number of place in line.
A fellow screamed frantically into the microphone stating which numbers were next to be admitted into the store. He was a tired, burnt out employee. “NUMBERS 150 to 200!#!@!*!” He did that with the next several groups until I found Miriam.
I suggested that she let him know that he sets the tone by using that frantic, out of control, crazed tone. The people in line were already excited and tired – was he adding to the fun of the evening or setting things off in a negative direction? Although he felt the same, the next messages were delivered with strength and warmth.
ANY time you speak, you are an actor delivering your message in the best way possible for others to receive it; it doesn’t matter what is going on with you. If it is appropriate to tell what is going on with you - just deliver your message in a way that can be most easily received.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
This new study of the mind's workings is amazing and may help you -
“People tidy up more thoroughly when there is a faint smell of cleaning liquid in the air; they become more competitive if there is a briefcase in sight and more cooperative when they glimpsed works like "
‘dependable’ and ‘support’ - all without being aware of the change or what prompted it.”
I am always conscious of the environment during coaching and seminars - waaaaay more than I am at home. Materials on
tables are set out evenly; I clean up used cups (Avoiding their minds wandering to, ‘I sure would like another cup’) and food items and scraps of paper during breaks. I want nothing to be distracting or setting a tone other than the one I want, which is Clear-Clean- Open environment.
When you speak, arrive early and clear up the used breakfast/lunch stuff, other people’s charts and white boards, etc. I want them listening to YOU!
“People tidy up more thoroughly when there is a faint smell of cleaning liquid in the air; they become more competitive if there is a briefcase in sight and more cooperative when they glimpsed works like "
‘dependable’ and ‘support’ - all without being aware of the change or what prompted it.”
I am always conscious of the environment during coaching and seminars - waaaaay more than I am at home. Materials on
tables are set out evenly; I clean up used cups (Avoiding their minds wandering to, ‘I sure would like another cup’) and food items and scraps of paper during breaks. I want nothing to be distracting or setting a tone other than the one I want, which is Clear-Clean- Open environment.
When you speak, arrive early and clear up the used breakfast/lunch stuff, other people’s charts and white boards, etc. I want them listening to YOU!
Labels: Control their Receptivity
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Happy Holiday Season!
When you conquer anxiety in one area of your life, it makes it easier to overcome it in public speaking.
Years ago I examined the Beliefs I had about holidays. I had moved from my hometown to San Francisco and flew home for holidays. Someone asked, "Do you have to? Do you want to?" I answered, "No" to both and didn't fly back there for two years. I am not suggesting you do the same; just look at the beliefs that worked and did not work for you during this holiday season.
Anxiety lives between the ears.
Be well. Stay in touch,
Reesa
woolf@ConfidentSpeaking.com
When you conquer anxiety in one area of your life, it makes it easier to overcome it in public speaking.
Years ago I examined the Beliefs I had about holidays. I had moved from my hometown to San Francisco and flew home for holidays. Someone asked, "Do you have to? Do you want to?" I answered, "No" to both and didn't fly back there for two years. I am not suggesting you do the same; just look at the beliefs that worked and did not work for you during this holiday season.
Anxiety lives between the ears.
Be well. Stay in touch,
Reesa
woolf@ConfidentSpeaking.com
Thursday, December 21, 2006
It is the holiday season-I am getting emails from people who have made toasts at weddings and family reunions. They get great feedback from others because they are actually controlling their anxiety and appearing confident!
This information works; I wish it would come in pill form, but it does work with regular application (take one skill and call me in the morning).
Be peaceful and well.
Reesa
This information works; I wish it would come in pill form, but it does work with regular application (take one skill and call me in the morning).
Be peaceful and well.
Reesa
Friday, October 20, 2006
• “I want to live in a world of no frustration and no inconvenience.”
• “I hate change. I want to live in a dull repetitive world.”
• I lost my place in my notes; I am a total loser.
• I messed up that speech. I will never have a good career.
• I made mistakes. They will never trust me again.
• I did poorly. I am a loser. I will never be good at this.
• This is the end of the world.
Get rid of those thoughts, and you will become more successful.
• “I hate change. I want to live in a dull repetitive world.”
• I lost my place in my notes; I am a total loser.
• I messed up that speech. I will never have a good career.
• I made mistakes. They will never trust me again.
• I did poorly. I am a loser. I will never be good at this.
• This is the end of the world.
Get rid of those thoughts, and you will become more successful.
Watch out for these thoughts! These are the ones that will sabotage you.
* “Things shouldn’t be this way. This is not how I want it.”
* “I should be the person I want myself to be.”
* “Others should behave the way I think is right.”
* “I shouldn’t have to speak up!”
* “They see I’m uncomfortable. They should stop asking me.”
* “There needs to be an easier way for me to meet new people.”
* “Things shouldn’t be this way. This is not how I want it.”
* “I should be the person I want myself to be.”
* “Others should behave the way I think is right.”
* “I shouldn’t have to speak up!”
* “They see I’m uncomfortable. They should stop asking me.”
* “There needs to be an easier way for me to meet new people.”
Change Your Thinking and Change Your Life
• Replacement Thinking means becoming aware of the irrational thoughts that race through your brain both when anticipating and delivering any speech, large or small.
• You can’t always choose what life throws at you, but you can choose the way you look at those things.
• You are trusted enough to deliver this information.
• Others respect your opinion.
• Since all humans make mistakes, you will make mistakes when you speak. The goal of perfection is a ridiculous goal.
• They will usually forgive you when you make a mistake or say something that is less than brilliant when you fix it immediately.
• Keep your same demeanor when you make a mistake-everyone gets uncomfortable when you look very upset and apologize over and over.
• Replacement Thinking means becoming aware of the irrational thoughts that race through your brain both when anticipating and delivering any speech, large or small.
• You can’t always choose what life throws at you, but you can choose the way you look at those things.
• You are trusted enough to deliver this information.
• Others respect your opinion.
• Since all humans make mistakes, you will make mistakes when you speak. The goal of perfection is a ridiculous goal.
• They will usually forgive you when you make a mistake or say something that is less than brilliant when you fix it immediately.
• Keep your same demeanor when you make a mistake-everyone gets uncomfortable when you look very upset and apologize over and over.
